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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Confusedchaos]Thank you guys for the advice. I can't put into words how much I needed to read this. It really helped me make a decision that is right for my son and myself. I do have friends, and family that can help me through this... But it will be hell to leave him, I am leaving him asap but the only problem is, do I keep his secret? He says he will "kill himself" if I leave him. He also says that I can't tell anyone about his secret. He is more worried about the secret getting out instead of losing us. I am worried if I leave, he will get crazy and harass me . i just am a little scared to leave. But I am going to leave because with the fighting and the confusing me by manipulating me into thinking it is my fault is confusing and physically making me sick. I do have a best friend who is willing to help me in any way and that includes help me get an apartment. Only problem is, when I do try to leave, he hides my keys, and blocks the doorway and says I can't take our son. and then if I say "i will tell everyone about your secret" he says all I do is threaten him and that I am not allowed to go anywhere because I am not thinking clearly.[/quote]

In that case you need to file for a protection order and get out NOW. [/quote]

This. I was in your shoes, OP (minus having a kid). I did everything I could to fix things and nothing worked, and I am SO pissed at myself for wasting my 20s on a creep. You are in the prime of your life.

Addicts rarely change. It's only when they lose everything, hit rock bottom, and the pain of staying the same is worse than the pain of changing. Even then it's a crapshoot- I've seen addicts with years of sobriety, great support systems, and who were determined to change eventually relapse. Even if he goes to therapy he likely won't change, or will relapse years down the road. It's just not worth it.

Also, get the hell away from anyone who threatens to kill themselves. If they will kill themselves, they will kill other people, too. He could easily get charged up one day, kill you, your son, and himself. [/quote]

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