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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am a lower drive DW with a very high drive DH. My DH is quite monogamous, and it was actually me who introduced the idea. After a night out on the town where I was flirting and felt great, I went home and we had incredible for sex for several days. When we discussed what had happened and how I felt, we started discussing options for being monogomish or opening up our relationship. We tried Tinder and I went on a couple of dates, but he had a harder time finding people and it's definitely a challenge if he's struggling to put the kids to bed while I'm getting ready for a date, so we shut that down pretty quickly. I got pregnant again so we're not pursuing anything. Actively seeking people out on Tinder (which is how some friends we know opened up their relationship), felt too forced for us and we weren't comfortable with it, we also both agreed polyamory (having an additional romantic partner, like a boyfriend) also felt too strange to us, though not entirely off the table. Being monogomish, flirting or just making out, having a hook up or friends with benefits felt better to us as long as we are remaining open and honest and our relationship is in a good place. He's a lot less interested in pursuing other people anyways, and is okay if only I have a hook-up, but I find the option to think about being with other people and knowing the opportunity to be with other people exists and talking about it, spices things up enough and brings enough excitement that I may never really act on it.  So that's our story, we have not actually opened things up, but continue to explore the idea. I think honesty, open communication and respect are really important, you have to decide how much you want to know about what he's doing and feel comfortable that if feelings of jealousy arise he's going to be supportive and you can work through them together.

The one couple we knew who really opened up their relationship ended in divorce a little over a year later, though I suspect they weren't in a good place before. Another couple we know is just start out like we are, and I'm certainly curious to see how it goes.

I wish you the best of luck and i think your willingness you support him in his needs and is very loving, definitely check out some the of the TED talks, recent NYT article, podcasts, FB groups and books out there, there are a lot of resources for people considering this lifestyle.[/quote]

We went through a similar process a few years ago and we're open.  I have to say it really brings back your sex drive.  It's not like I've slept eith a lot of men, but the ones that I have were just based on sexual attraction and chemistry.  For the last year I've had an fwb who I met at the gym.  He's tall, AA, has lots of muscles and is very well endowed.  We meet up once every week or so and the sex is incredible.  I've done lots of things with him that I wouldn't normally do and its opened me up to more fun things with the DH.[/quote]

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