Reply to Women who are with men who are just not that into them- why?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Or her mother treated her this way. A lot of issues are connected to how your mom treated you from the time you were a baby. It's your most important, intimate relationship, and sets the tone for what is normal to you.

My mom was distant and never liked me. My father was loving and doted on me. Yet I found myself drawn to men I had to win over. (It didn't help that men typically chased me, so a challenging guy seemed more attractive.) And even when I thought I'd figured it all out, and told myself to go for men who'd treat me as my dad had, I still found myself with a man who had a tendency to distance himself and who didn't appreciate me. And I thought that was normal and what I deserved, since my NPD mom hadn't liked me. My saving grace was probably having a loving dad. I don't trust myself to [/quote]

Wow, I could have written this.  I essentially married my mom and didn't realize any of this crap until I was in my 40s (!!!) and had a child.  However, I no longer look back on dad in such a positive light.  While his love and affection maybe saved me from becoming a sociopath or psychopath, he knew what she was doing to me and he let it happen.  [/quote]

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