Reply to Could 13 yo DD just be discovering she is trans?

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Reply to "Could 13 yo DD just be discovering she is trans?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I am not 22:22 but unless things have changes in the past year the brain scan science is not there yet generally for making a diagnosis - and for reasons not worth listing it may never alone be enough -- but will be helpful.  But I thank 22:22 for reminding everyone on this thread that just because some teens may say something one day out of the blue or some professionals are not well trained, does not mean we should ignore the real problem for real transgender kids/teens who are benefiting - mostly -- from wider social acknowledgment if not always acceptance.

I would caution that in one way the stories on the videos are exceptions and not the rules. Many  very young children who display interest in being the other gender do grow out of it - it is not usually - but can sometimes -- be indicative of more.  What is hard is that some truly trans kids may seem "normal" in their early years in many ways and then changes begin to become more obvious -- in our kid's case certainly by about 8 -- maybe 7.  But especially with natal females, it is sometimes harder to see the changes -- especially for parents --because of cultural acceptance of tomboys.  My advice to other parents who have concerns for one reason or another is to treat this like researching anything else -- don't just talk to experts and read books, but also look at evidence yourself.  You are a parent - a person -- you have some expertise in how boys and girls behave - even accepting a wide variation. How much evidence points one way and how much points another?  Brain scans someday will help, but they won't decide what makes a man's  brain or a women's brain -- only what are the most commmon patterns. At the end of the day, if a person feels to their core that they are the opposite gender of their biology and that they are miserable if unable to live that way, and they seem happier after socially transitioning ,  and there is no other evidence of schitzophrenia or other serious mental disorders, that's where you are going to end up. It is hard for a parent to tease it all out and be as sure as possible they are not making a mistake -- and in cultures where this was unthinkable and medical solutions unavailable -- it was perhaps easier for parents in some ways. 
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