Reply to What do I need to do over the next 6 years to get my child into a top school?

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[quote=Anonymous]NP here.  This has been a (mostly) helpful thread.

I really feel for the OP - I am American, I went through this process myself almost 30 years ago (when by the way, "well rounded" was already OUT, at least for Suburban NJ applicants to top schools . . .)  It seems like in the intervening years, the college application process has just gotten worse and more complicated.  Back then, with tuition high (but not the sky-high level of today), selective colleges did not provide merit aid (with very few exceptions).  Now, it seems like there's a complicated game to be played.  The Ivy League and tippy-top schools provide no merit aid, but the middle tier and below of selective colleges and some flaghip state universitities, now do.  So, you have to factor that in.  Acceptance rates are lower than ever.  Seems like a crap shoot!

My older DD is also in 7th grade.  She is the one bringing up this topic with me (I've not brought it up).  Just got her report card yesterday, and she has a 4.0 in MCPS (public).  She asks me: "what do I have to do to get into a really great college?  If I keep a 4.0 all through high school, will I get into a really good college?"  I hate that my answer has to be: "If you study/work hard, I'm sure you will go to a college that will be really great for you."  I think it's hard at 12 years old to have to recognize there is a luck/financial element.  The rules are not clear like in Europe (do well on exam - get into good college - end of story).  On the one hand, I think it's great that my DD has these dreams, but on the other hand, I don't want her to define "success" as getting into fill-in-the-blank-NAME school given the luck and financial elements at play.

Also, while I get why top schools like "pointy" kids, I take issue with this a bit.  My kid is freaking 12 years old.  If she wants to try a sport or activity that she's not sure about or might not excel in, she should do it!  Not be held back to at 12 only participate in those things that will help build a college resume down the line.  Some people have many diverse interests.  This is not a bad thing![/quote]

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