Reply to Jen Hatmaker

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[quote=Anonymous]I totally agree that we can relate to the idea that even our kindest, most sensible and loving kids can do really dumb things. Even things with big consequences. There is that painful wish that we had a magic wand to fix it all. No doubt we made mistakes as parents. Maybe these mistakes contributed to the bad decisions. I have apologized to all my kids for things I wish I'd done better.

BUT....there is a kind of parenting out there that seems to celebrate selfishness and brattiness all through childhood and beyond . It's the kind of narcissistic parenting that somehow sees the child as an extension of themselves and their entitlement.its the parent who laughs at the kid who is rude to adults, thoughtless of others, and puts themselves first. Then, when the inevitable train wreck happens, whether it's drugs, DUI, toxic relationships, vandalism, you name it, there is a withdrawal by the parent into a cocoon of self pity.I am not saying that the bad choices made by older kids are all the parents fault. Maybe they are not because of anything other than the stupidity and character of the kid. But I can say that that if we pass off bad behavior in a child as " just the way he/she is", that we shouldn't be too shocked when the bad behavior causes grown up problems.[/quote]

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