Reply to Stopping caring saved my marriage

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[quote=Anonymous]What existence are you talking about? If you go back and read the OP, she enjoys, loves, and appreciates her husband the more for having learned to detach from his annoying and negative characteristics. This is a far cry from living in a dead, vaguely hostile marriage.

If OP had continued to be overly invested and enmeshed in his opinions about everything, banging her head against the wall endlessly, she would have grown to dislike and resent him, and the marriage would have eroded and very likely have ended or turned into one of those dead, hostile marriages. We see that happen every day. Instead, she's content. And it took some compromise and learning to step back at times. Is he a perfect Prince Charming? No, but nobody's perfect and we are not Disney princesses.

As a creative and original thinker, I enjoy hearing the fresh perspective of the young and inexperienced, and I appreciate new insights from people outside of a situation, but if there's one thing you shouldn't do, it's look at other peoples' incredibly complex marriages from outside and make judgments. If you do, you'll be one of those constantly shocked at what goes on behind closed doors, who really is happy and who really is not.

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