Reply to Inheritance debacle. WWYD?

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[quote=Anonymous]I can't stand all of the people who immediately want to diagnose a person with mental health issues because they chose the path of least resistance in life.

This woman sounds like a classic failure to launch. She had means and opportunity (several degrees, a fiance at one point, several jobs). She CHOSE to not take advantage of them. She had her mind made up about what she was and wasn't willing to do (management or bust). I see these type of people all the time. Being entitled and believing that the world owes you something is not a mental illness.

The only difference between the people that I interact with all day is that they don't have the luxury of quitting their job, because they have to pay bills. Mary on the other hand, always had an out - go live with and be supported by mom.

If Thelma did anything wrong, it was that she didn't force Mary to be an adult - instead, enabling her to be a quitter and maintaining an entitled view on life.

My parents kicked me out of the house at 17 (because of my behavior - and I do not blame them). When I dropped out of college, they completely cut me off and we didn't speak for 10 years (the day I graduated from college). During the time that I was kicked out of my parents house, I was homeless, got into heroin, and lived under a bridge. I ended up in a hospital one day and realized that I had hit rock bottom. I detoxed while in the hospital. I ended up getting my life together. I made a choice to be a better person. I made a choice to be successful and to find happiness.

I wouldn't trade my parents for anything. Quite frankly, I would have been Mary if my parents didn't hold me accountable and force me to grow up, be responsible, and learn about everything that I was capable of doing (I now have my Master's, my PMP, have a great career, am amazing daughter). I truly believe that I would not have any of these things if it weren't for my parents "tough love".

My parents are also giving all of their assets to charities - nothing goes to the children or any other family member. I am not resentful of this. I understand that my parents were always big believers in social responsibility.

My point is - I feel sorry for Mary - but none of this is OP's fault. She has been placed in a very difficult situation and she is trying to make the best of it. However, for all the people who think that something is going on here that is not right, you are absolutely wrong. Mary had 50 years to make better decisions. The fact that she even believed that she could just leech off her mom for her entire life and afterlife, is really the same reason she is in this situation to begin with. That isn't mental illness - that is entitlement.[/quote]

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