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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I read the RS article, the follow-up article about others coming forward, and a few pages of this thread.  What a sad story.  I don't know what happened to Jackie that night, but I'm sure that she was wronged.  Like a few pps, I struggle with the thought of seven offenders.  I don't understand how she isn't ready to file charges.  She has done a pretty great job at making the incident public - why not keep going?

I support the Greek system.  I think that it is different at each school and probably from house to house, but generally I think it can be good.  Incidents like this give all frats a bad name, and that is a shame.  The good frat members should see this an opportunity and lead the charge for reform.

Last, I think the drinking age should change to 18 or 19.  Move some of the partying from frats and to the bars.  [/quote]

I agree that it's different from house to house, but I do not have ANY issues with the idea of fucked up group think during rush season, with deliberate humiliation and hazing of the rushees (not to mention their victims' humiliation). I don't understand why this is so hard to believe. There are hundreds of accounts of the demeaning way that many fraternities treat women - from former frat members, from women associated either willingly or unwillingly with the frats, from researchers. I agree that it's an opportunity for the upstanding human beings who choose to participate in this system to stand up for justice and morality, but it's clear that the social incentives for not doing that are too much for a lot of young people of both genders to resist.

Think about what was important to you when you were 18 years old, away from home for possibly the first time. Community. Being liked. Feeling grown up. Now imagine that something horrible happens to you. What do you do? Turn to your community. Call a friend to come get you. Go to the friendly university administrator. That's what we'd want our children to do, right? Now imagine that your friend comes to you, with this kind of story. Imagine that you're in a cutthroat system where associating with a person who accuses in this way could result in your social isolation. That's not fair, right? You weren't even there, you weren't part of it. You shouldn't be punished just because you know someone who is no longer on the approved list, right? I have no doubt whatsoever that many people involved in the situation have the best intentions. They probably think they're good people who care. Unfortunately, those friends and those administrators are contributing to the culture that discourages reporting.

I say this as a person who has sat at hospitals and police stations with friends who have reported sexual assaults. The questions that are asked of victims are triggering. They are asked to describe exactly what happened. They are not always asked in sensitive ways. Questions like "Had you been drinking?" and "What were you wearing?" can feel like accusations, especially hours after the crime. I agree that reporting is important. I would love if there was an effort to make it easier. I think the dean at UVA sounds like a nice person who has been treating victims with compassion and making them feel safe, in the immediate moment. I do not think she has been acting in their best interests by keeping the reporting on campus.

Remember, you can report what happened and decide not to bring charges. You should ALWAYS seek medical attention. When your kids go to college, learn what area hospitals actually have SAME nurses on staff. Here, it's WHC. If you go to the ER at GW to report a sexual assault, they will not have a person qualified to process a SAFE kit. Not a lot of people know that.[/quote]

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