Reply to How much would you spend on your spouse's milestone (50th) birthday?

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Reply to "How much would you spend on your spouse's milestone (50th) birthday?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]In my opinion It really depends on where the money is coming from. My wife doesn't work so if she ever did purchase a gift for me it would be from money that I myself earned and therefore I don't really see the item itself as a gift. Rather, on the few time in our marriage that she has actually purchased a gift for me, the more important aspect of the "gift" was the though or rather lack of thought she put into the "gift." The reason for this is that the because the money is from my earnings the only part of herself she put into the gift was her consideration for what I might need or want. In our case only once did she put any effort into the gift. It was the effort that made the gift special. Not the cost. And frankly the more expensive the gift when spending someone else's earning shows a profound lack of consideration for that other person.[/quote]

[b]This is asshattery.  [/b]Your wife works to enable you to work the way you do.  In the absence of her work, you would need to hire people to do what she does, and divert your focus from your work in order to put it on your kids and household.

You both earn your salary.

If I knew your wife, I would tell her to go back to work, so that she is not dependent on you.  And so that you get a clue.[/quote]

+1 That is really the perfect phrase to describe this. [/quote]

Why? I've got a friend and she feels the same. She went back to work a couple years ago and she tells me all the time that she hates when her husband buys her stuff because the money is earmarked for household stuff or she wanted to put the money into savings or something like that. She would prefer that he do something thoughtful rather than spending money. I think there feelings go both ways.[/quote]

But does she care about [i]where[/i] the money he spends comes from (his income vs hers)? Or just how it's spent.

The a-hole DH above thinks his earnings are his, not the household. Hope his wife bakes him up a chocolate poop pie (a la The Help) for his birthday to go with his shitty attitude. 
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