Reply to My daughter is extremely sensitive and I have some worries.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There are children like this who occasionally approach my daughter, who is disabled.  They run up and hug her because they want to "sympathize" with her.  But my daughter is not sad and she does not require pity and sympathy.  Anymore than some black stranger required a hug and gum.

There's something kind of weird and tasteless about what your daughter is doing.  It's not sensitivity.  I'm not trying to be mean, but if your daughter truly cares about BLM, take her to marches.  If she truly cares about homeless animals, get her involved.

Stewing in her own emotions is not a sign of sensitivity.   In fact, what she's doing can be downright insensitive. It's a sign of self-involvement.  It's inward focused, not outward focused.

I agree that there's a need for perhaps some therapy here, or at least some thoughtful dialogue.[/quote]

I disagree with you, I do think she's sensitive and outward focused. Sensitive people aren't happily indulging in the feelings they absorb from others. It can be stressful for them and it's very draining. My brother has a physical disability and he got a lot of blank stares and name calling in his life. I'm sure he would have much appreciated a random hug instead. Children are still learning how to handle and deal with emotions. Give them a break, insensitive they are not.[/quote]

Well of course my daughter would prefer hugs to stares and name calling. But is there not another alternative: being treated with the dignity and casual friendliness of any child her age is entitled to?
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As someone who is permanently physically disabled, and has gotten stares and name calling all my life, I agree with the PP that it's inward focused and not so much empathetic.  There is a huge movement in the disability community to remove the "you're so brave, you're such an inspiration" title people like to place on disabled people.  We want to be treated normally, like everyone else.  So running up to hug us or tells us "way to go" or "you're so inspiring" or "you should be so proud" is actually quite degrading.  It makes the attention on the speaker, to show what a nice person he/she is.  I don't want people talking to me or approaching me this way, so I imagine a black person would find it totally weird to have that Target interaction.  It is definitely crossing a line.

Stella Young gave a wonderful talk on this very issue, it is from the perspective of the handicap being approached by able bodied, maybe it would help to hear from one of us how we think.

https://youtu.be/8K9Gg164Bsw

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