Reply to If you married, the wrong person, what were the signs that you missed?

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[quote=Anonymous]This 
"Never marry someone who sent able to have difficult conversations. If they avoid or just roll over and agree with you- run!!'

This
"You can *talk* through disagreements; he can stay without getting overly emotional or wanting to be right or getting his way all the time. The same applies to you. You both should be looking for win-win solutions where possible. No yelling, name-calling or hitting!"

This
"In realtiy this kind of guy was made to bend and push down all normal negative feelings, and has the kind of mother who will make your lives hell.

His suppressed negative emotions will have a tendency to find their way to the surface like repulsive worms, in ways and at times you'd least expect it.

Another thing I will watch out for is someone who can't regulate emotions in a healthy way--like, he blows up over nothing, takes out his stresses and angers on others, and can't have a normal discussion without getting so worked up he has to shut it down or yell. A lot of times they're good at hiding that they do this, and people who don't live with them have no idea."

This
"How does he handle disappointment and bad breaks? I ignored how despondent my BF got over setbacks in his career--I didn't want to be the girl who left a guy at his low point. But the truth is that life has a lot of set backs and you don't want to be with someone that doesn't handle them well. My grandmother had a framed print that said something like any man can greet a sunny day with a smile, but the measure of a man is whether he can keep the smile when it starts to pour. I saw it years later and thought "yeah"

Also (my addition)
Take a close look at his family. Regardless of what he promises, he's most likely to do what they do and behave how them behave. I seriously recommend avoiding anyone with serious mental illnesses in their family or serious family dysfunctions. 
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