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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your post seems very focused on yourself and what you look like.  I understand you may have been trying to avoid the typical dcum responses of "you let yourself go which is why your husband doesn't want you."

However, you still come across as very focused on your looks and how your husband should want you.  You don't say anything about wanting to please your husband or what he looks like.

This reminds me of my own spouse.  He is very focused on himself, including when in bed.  It's a turnoff.  Even this morning his move to try and get me to have sex was to tell me he has a hard penis and look at it.  Nothing about me.  [/quote]

OP here, you are right in the sense that my post was very self centered and my approach to this issue is surely wrong: I see men as naturally willing to have sex and the key first step in that context as whether or not I am desirable. I dont think of myself as overly self centered in bed, I am not a starfish, I like to give Bj, I am enthusiastic. I tell him whenever I find him good looking or attractive. But indeed I am probably a very average lover, I am open minded but not very creative myself..

And You definitely strike a chord when you talk about wanting to please him, my problem is not that I don't want to, it is that I don't know what he likes. Writing this down is scary :( I have had a few lovers in my life, and it is crazy to realize that the man I chose to marry is close to being the one I sexually understand the least.. What a mess..[/quote]

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