Reply to Husband's Reaction to my Sadness

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Have you actually asked, calmly, for cuddles and hugs? I j is you're sad. But everyone deals with sadness and emotions in different ways, or may need different things at different times.

DH by nature is a fixer, and will try to fix my grief, sadness, frustration, etc. So I used my words one day and TOLD HIM "when I am sad, please don't offer me solutions. Please just hold me." If I'm feeling overwhelmed and need a hug, I ASK for what I need, and he is only more than happy to oblige.

He's not sure what will fix it for you, so he's just trying to. Use your words and tell him what you need, without pushing him away and being angry and frustrated that he is both trying to help and not a mind reader.[/quote]

"Honey, I just need a hug and some time to feel sad about this.  There's nothing you can really do to 'fix' it until I work through my emotions. Thank you for lightening my load by bringing home dinner.  Anything else practical you can do like that will I take some time to process would be greatly appreciated."[/quote]

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