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[quote=Anonymous]OP here. A few things ... First of all, the home life is not as toxic to the kids as many of you think. We have always presented a loving, unified household to them. We eat as a family almost every night. A lot of laughing. Quality time. Big, loving extended families. The hurts and resentment I believe have been withheld from them to a large extent. I agree that kids pick up way more than adults realize, but there is no way that they would be anything other than decimated, crushed, blind-sided and damaged for years, if our family unit dissolved. We had a good long talk the other night. I don't know what the future holds, but I feel better about it now than I did six months ago, mainly because I feel a lot better about myself. That has to project outward. I hope she notices and appreciates it. I saw a good quote from noted marriage expert (and vehement opponent of divorce) Michele Weiner-Davis: "If you divorce, it will take lots of work to make your life happy again. Instead, why not put that energy into keeping your family together?"[/quote]

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