Reply to How did STBX take it when you introduced kids to new SO?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]
OP here. Thanks, this makes sense to me. I was about to say the same thing, that I'm quite sure the date when the paperwork is finalized has no significance for my kids. They don't even understand the word "divorce" and wouldn't distinguish between "divorced" and "separated."

I think only one person has answered my original question, which was about how the STBX reacted to the introduction of the SO. I'm guessing that didn't go over well in most cases. [/quote]

OP, I'm the 11:12 poster. Sadly, the STBX didn't react well. She started telling her 7 year old child that I was the reason their marriage had failed. That Dad had cheated on Mom with me. It was all a ridiculous lie and DH and I strongly suspect it was the other way around (wife had a long-term "friend" whom she started officially dating and introducing to her family less than a month after my DH moved out).  Since STBX was openly dating someone (open to their daughter and open to other family members) from the very beginning, once he and I got serious, he thought she would be ok with him introducing me to daughter. (Their divorce was taking a loooooong time because she was fighting him about money so we started dating before it was final but it had been almost 2 years since they had physically separated.) So, at least with her, it turns out that what's good for the geese was not good for the gander. But they fought (fight) like cats and dogs so I guess it really depends on your relationship with STBX and her personality.

To be safe, maybe you should talk to STBX about it first. It's the considerate thing to do. But if she freaks out and says no, and then you still do it, well... that's not an awesome place to be either.[/quote]

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