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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Found out that DH had gay sex many years ago"
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[quote=Anonymous]It would be a good idea for you, OP, to do some reading about the subject of childhood rape and how it affects men later on in life. There are a variety of ways to handle this kind of trauma. I've heard of men who were raped as boys who do have an experimental relationship as a young adult with another man. They're acting out and trying to process what they went through. Then they often settle into being straight, if that's what they are, but they usually have some ways of acting out later. Maybe his need for a dom/sub relationship with you is his way of continuing to act out what happened to him, as it shaped his expression of sexuality. If the two of you are happy and safe with how you do things, and he doesn't act out in destructive ways, then maybe the two of you will be fine. If things get difficult, he'd be wise to talk to a therapist. Childhood traumas sometimes have a way of oozing out of seemingly healed wound sites, in ways you wouldn't expect.[/quote]
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