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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

I made space to find myself...

Next, try new things... Throw a bunch of new activities into your life and see which stick.

Third, but perhaps most important, DO NOT go looking for someone. Seriously...Stick to casual friends/activity buddies for a bit.

...Don't lay on (additional) guilt by feeling selfish for taking time to find yourself. [/quote]

This PP's advice is spot on.  Some of the things you HAVE to do turn into things you want to do:

I seriously downsized so I could live in an affordable place, and it turns out I feel freed up by the absence of clutter (thanks to Craigslist, Ebay and Goodwill).

I could no longer rely on my husband's cooking so with the help of Blue Apron I learned to cook and actually kind of enjoy it.

And some of the things I wanted to do were actually counterproductive.  For example it seemed obvious to sign onto Match.com right away like my ex did, he met somebody right away, I didn't find anyone interesting after 1.5 years and the process was exhausting.  What I really need is friends and now I'm focusing on spending more time with the friends I sort-of ignored during the marriage, and that's much more satisfying.

Like another poster, my ex was always watching TV every evening, and I do other things now that would have been impossible with the TV on: play piano or the stereo, read, etc.

I also run every morning and rely on the endorphin rush to cheer me up and distract me from the depression that is often waiting around the corner.[/quote]

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