Reply to S/O: Stop enabling men and blaming women for IL dynamics

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Reply to "S/O: Stop enabling men and blaming women for IL dynamics"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This only works if you don't really like your ILs.  I stopped all involvement regarding things involving FIL.  My dh can go years before he remembers his own father's b-day, father's day, etc.  Would I have done this with MIL?  No way.  Sadly, she has passed away, but I loved her dearly and made all the plans to see her (most of which dh took credit for, but whatever).[/quote]

No, this also work if you DO like your ILs (or like them "well enough") *and* your spouse has a good relationship with them. MIL complained to me that DH doesn't call her enough, so I told her, "That is between you and DH. Please talk to him directly. I am sure he'll want to know how you feel." So they had a talk about it, and now he makes a point to call her more. I'll throw him a bone--if I get off the phone with my parents, I'll say, "Have you talked to MIL lately?" And he appreciates the reminder. But it's on him.

MIL is a grown-up. DH is a grown-up. They can manage their relationship![/quote]

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