Reply to Possible I just ID'd the other woman I didn't know existed at first sight?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you don't care he is cheating. And you are thinking about cheating. Why not just have an open marriage?[/quote]

The funny thing is that HE would never go for that. He's SUPER judgey about cheaters. Has cut off friends before who cheat. It's also not that I want to cheat myself, but I miss intimacy and feeling really loved and appreciated by someone. I'm sure he does, too, and I could see if someone came along and piled on the flirting and made a connection, it would be tempting.

Really, it's not the cheating that bothers me as much as the bigger sin that we have lost our closeness and if there is cheating that has gone on it's just a result of that.

Also, my gut tells me that he's not actively cheating now but probably has hooked up with this woman in the past when things were even worse between us -- he may still be, I don't know and either way it doesn't make a huge difference. But things have getting better between us and we've both been vowing to recommit to each other, and in fact it's why we went out together last night and I came along to this interest of his.

Bottom line is that rather than put my energy into an open marriage and finding other guys to date, it'd be awesome if I could make a happier life with the guy who is the father of my children and lives under my roof every day. I really don't judge open marriage, I just don't know where I'd find the time. [/quote]

Has it not occurred to you that the cheating is the CAUSE and not the result of losing your "closeness"?[/quote]
I think the OP has the order right- loss of closeness and hen cheating, not the other way around.[/quote]

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