Reply to Donor eggs. vs. adoption

Forum Index » Infertility Support and Discussion

Reply to "Donor eggs. vs. adoption"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  Also wanted to add that another consideration is that I have an own egg daughter already.  If I do DE and have another girl I feel like that would be a challenging dynamic--would the DE daughter say that I'm not her real mom and feel negatively toward OE daughter? I feel like the dynamic would be much easier if DE baby was the other gender, though there's a 50% chance it would be a girl.  I feel like being adopted would be easier for a child to digest than coming from DE.  I wouldn't be so hesitant about DE if I didn't already have an own egg child, but my daughter looks exactly like me and the DE daughter wouldn't.[/quote]

OP, I feel similarly.  I am faced with secondary infertility and I also feel weird about the prospect of having one child with my egg and one without.  I had not thought about whether that difference lessens if the second kid if a different sex than the first.  I think I am a person who tends to feel guilty and am overly-sensitive, and I would feel bad about possible inequalities (would my genes be better or worse than a donors?)  What is my kid suffers with obesity and the donor kid doesn't?  What if the donor kid gets childhood diabetes and mine doesn't?  I think I would always unreasonably blame myself for having given my two kids different baselines, which I know is out of my control.  
[/quote]

That could be the case also with one biological and one adopted child - one of them can turn out to be smarter, more beautiful, more gifted than the other.  And even in biological siblings health is not always equal.  Who could be "blamed" in this case?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics