Reply to I am not sure I can live with my son anymore.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What are the consequences of this behavior?  Does he have a cell phone, video games, or outside activities that get taken away?  Do you make sure there are no electronics in his bedroom.  Have you take the hinges off his door because he lost privacy?

Because I would never in a million years tolerate that mental/physical abuse you are allowing to take over your home.  You need someone to come into the home, evaluate the entire situation and take over with advice/solutions.  A home counselor.  Similar to Super Nanny.  I remember people posting recommendations here awhile back.  Something went wrong somewhere and it needs to be fixed ASAP. [/quote]

I am so glad you think you wouldn't tolerate the situation and that clamping down is the answer.  Don't you think we tried that?  Talk to me when you have a child in your life that might have a mental illness. It's nothing like the parenting books, or how we were parented, etc. could prepare you for.  It is heartbreaking, overwhelming, and awful.  And it is the judgement of people like you that make the whole thing that much more painful and isolating.   It's easy to armchair quarterback.  I did it myself before being in this situation.  And let me tell you it is humbling like you cannot imagine.  [/quote]

Well if you are the OP and have put up with all of this without getting mental counseling and are saying you don't want to live with him,  that is YOUR fault for not dealing with it.

And I am going to guess the kid still has all of his electronics, has a door on his bedroom, and has a cell phone to use whenever he pleases.  [/quote]

I GET it.  I have been you in a previous life.  Let me tell you, until you have lived it you have no clue.  If it were that easy, than it would have worked.  I have been through a lot in my life, and I can tell you this is the hardest and most painful.  I was raised by an alcoholic parent, terrible family life, I was raped in my 20s (violent, stranger rape), and this is the worst, most helpless feeling you can imagine.  Signed, a parent going through similar to the OP.  [/quote]

This is the OP.  We have had counseling off and on for years.  It's just not getting any better.   And yes, you cannot imagine what it feels like to want to walk away from it all when it is your own child.  It is awful and nothing I ever thought I would feel in my life.  Be thankful you do not have to go through this.  FWIW I have other children, they have their "normal" issues and yes, we take away privileges and the like, and that works. The difference is this child, who clearly has a lot more going on than what we do in our regular life as parents to regular kids.  [/quote]

You could send him to boarding school. Or a reform school type of thing. [/quote]

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