Reply to When Spouses Don't Handle Their Parents

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]When I read the posts in this forum, it often comes up that if there are in-law issues, a spouse should "handle" his or her parents.  What about when a spouse doesn't and won't handle his or her parents?  My DH is terrible at handling his parents, to the point where they just do whatever and the kids and I are expected to just deal with whatever they do.  We've been to counseling about this issue and DH says he gets it, but nothing changes.  DH reverts back to the "they mean well" or "it's not that big a deal" or whatever the excuse of the day is for the in-laws. Basically, the idea is not to ever talk about anything or rock any boat.  It's very frustrating.[/quote]

Same here. He doesn't like how his parents behave as houseguests but won't speak to them about it. It's been over 5 years of it. He's embarrassed but too scared to correct the bad pattern that has emerged.  They just have such poor communication and then he rationalizes and says "they flew here 5 hours" or "they're family."  The kids and I get the short end of the stick (and both of our jobs) but DH just keeps bending over backwards and opening his pocketbook for them each and every time.

I'm trying to raise my kids with better verbal communication skills. In my book, besides you spouse, if you can't tell your family (parents) something, who can you tell?[/quote]

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