Reply to Feel Like DH Abandoned Me

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm the OP.

I feel like DH could have been present more if he wanted to. He works from home and has more leave than he could ever use. His boss encouraged him to take time off. He declined. He splits custody 50/50 with his kids' mom. She offered to keep them on his scheduled weekends if needed. He declined. His grad school classes are online so it's not like he had to be somewhere at a specific time. It just seems like he could have been there more if it was important to him. Rationally I know that he didn't need to be there, there was nothing he could do, etc. My experience with family in the hospital is that you stay with them as much as you can but I get that everyone doesn't operate this way.

We don't have local family and my closest friends aren't here either so I was really dependent him. I felt incredibly guilty asking him to stay longer because I recognized that life was still going on even if I was stuck in the hospital. It was just a tough situation all around. I'm not angry at him now and I wasn't then.

Eventually I asked my mom to fly here and she did. When she arrived he checked out completely, which I guess also contributes to how I feel about the whole experience now. [/quote]

Me again.  I wanted to clarify that I did not expect him to not prioritize his children first. I think DCUM is particularly hard on stepmoms. I completely understand that the kids were in his life before I was and I don't expect him to ignore them because I needed him.

Also the hospital is less than 15 minutes from home with free parking. The location/distance did not inhibit him from visiting. [/quote]

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