Reply to "What does 'sex' mean?"

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Reply to ""What does 'sex' mean?" - second grader"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]14:25 again - not to mention.. she "allows" him to put his penis in her vagina? Your kids are already going to grow up thinking that the burden of consent and decision making is always on the female when it comes to sex - don't start setting them up to think like this from the beginning.

Sex and consent are dyadic processes. If you have a son, he needs to understand the role males play in the emotional and consent-based issues around sex. If you have a daughter, she needs to understand that she has bodily autonomy and never has to "allow" anything to happen - teach her to be an active decision maker. If you're used to just letting things happen, it's a lot harder to say no when something you don't want to happen starts. [/quote]

I don't disagree with any of this in concept, I do think you're WAY over-thinking it for the eight year old crowd.

Here's how I would explain it:

"Remember when you asked where babies come from?  And I explained the whole penis-in-the-vagina thing?  That's sex.  It's something that adults do, but not kids.  It's just not a kid thing.  Anyway, how did this come up?  [Confused look]  Someone said sex is when two penises rub together?"

Sit back and let your DC share the context -- who brought it up etc.  If it were me, I'd listen for as long as DC was willing to talk.  If anything DC said raised a flag, I'd probably ask a question or two about penises -- did that person want to show you his?  Ask to see yours?  But ONLY if DC shared something that sounded sketchy.  Otherwise, I wouldn't make a big deal about it.  I'd just assume it was some kid talking with authority about something he knew nothing about.  That part is typical eight year old behavior, in my experience.  :-)  [/quote]

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