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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.

1.  I do not want the ring. I never even mentioned wanting the ring so I have no idea where that came from. I am nearly 40 and have no interest in swiping a 21 year olds engagement ring.

2. I said it is not over because though the family is laid back, my grandmother is liked a treasured jewel to them. My uncle and my mother's other siblings will not let this aunt off without an explanation. That will have zero to do with me, whether or not I tell my mom myself.

This post is solely about whether I should approach my mother on my own or just let her siblings do it. I think I was hoping that if I did it, it would be less of a big deal than if the siblings brought it up (and then my mom will come back and ask me). Again, it is not only about the ring, it is the way my aunt reacted. I do not think anyone will try to take the ring back - that would be crazy. 
[/quote]

OP, I don't think you should mention it to your mom.  Let her siblings do it.  It's a situation between them and your aunt.  I understand why you'd want to warn your mom about what is happening, but it'll just come across like you're gossiping and pot-stirring.

Sorry your family is going through this.  [/quote]

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