Reply to If you have adult daughters, and you are close to them, how did you do it?

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Reply to "If you have adult daughters, and you are close to them, how did you do it?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I feel that I have a good relationship with my daughter (20), but not with my mother. My mother has many issues and after years of therapy I am able to deal with her.

With your own children, I think it starts with respect - demanding it and giving it. That includes not teasing or breaking their confidence. I am my daughter's biggest cheerleader, and she knows it. I tell her how much I love her and how proud of her I am, and I know she knows I mean it. At the same time, I am honest with her about how I need to let her go and make her own choices and live her own life. I try to keep the communication going by saying out loud what I am thinking and modeling that we are negotiating a new relationship as she gets older.

And I always apologize if I need to.

I also think that it is important to spend time outdoors with your children when they are young, away from electronics and so forth. You can have great talks and times together hiking and camping. Find positive things that the kids enjoy and be fully present with them while engaging in them. And with younger ones, read to them lots and then you can talk about what you read, so that gives you a framework for discussing how life works and how people work. [/quote]

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