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[quote=Anonymous]I don't love my parents, OP.  I wasn't brought up in an abusive situation like what you describe.  You know the whole attachment parenting theory?  Well, I am definitely text book insecure attachment.   I always thought of my mom about as close as a school teacher.  Someone who would make sure I didn't die, lol, but not much more than that.  She wasn't close at all.  Didn't respond to some basic needs.  She refused to take care of me when I was sick because it freaked her out.  No hugs, no I love yous, no nothing.  Some emotional abuse, but nothing like what you have probably been through.

And my dad was never in the picture at all emotionally.    I am very emotionally detached from them.  I don't hate them at all.  My father is dead, and I now take care of my elderly mother.  I do it out of a sense of compassion for anyone who would be ill, and out of a sense of duty.  But certainly not out of love.

Do I tell people this? Not really, I've told one friend, but that was within the context of ongoing discussions about parenting, etc.

What I "do" do is try not to repeat this pattern with my kid.   I work very hard on helping him develop and maintain secure attachments.   It's how I focus my (past) pain and (current) disappointment in my childhood relationships.  [/quote]

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