Reply to who has actually talked to in laws about problems and did it help at all?

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Reply to "who has actually talked to in laws about problems and did it help at all?"

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[quote=Anonymous]Here's my fantasy: ILs and sibs act like mature adults to set good examples for my kids.

Reality? My ILs had tantrums and petty spats with each other and DH in front of our kids when I used to show up. They used to gossip/complain about me to DH behind my back (even about parenting? even the childless ones?) when I didn't show up.

I even put up with SIL's hysterical antics when involved in a "LTR" with what turned out to be a man with a wife and kids in his home country. She put herself, family and friends through this self-caused drama for years!

After all this, I even let BIL live with us rent-free after he lost yet another job when I had a SN toddler in the house and then complained about me to DH!  He had to go and I will never EVER see him again. Apologies? No way! Thank You? Not in his vocabulary.

Factor in this? None of our sibs are married and they're facing their 50s with extreme bitterness, so the people who didn't marry them probably made good choices.

We tried talking. We tried forgiving. We tried understanding. We tried "cautionary tale" (i.e., yes Auntie said/did that, but we don't say/do that in our house).

We've been married 20+ years. Our ILs/sibs will never EVER grow up. Their personalities solidified decades ago.

We're done.[/quote]

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