Reply to No Respect for DH, and falling out of love.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I hate the people on DCUM. You have valid complaints. You have FOUR kids instead of three and you didn't bargain for that when you got married.

I can't tell a stranger to get divorced, especially since this is just one side of the story, but you do need to check him when he starts to complain and yell about the decisions you make. Don't even entertain that nonsense. He can make a decision and stand by it or he can shut the fuck up. Stay firm on that.

I don't see this working out in the long run and am not one of the "stay together for the kids!!!" because two dysfunctional parents who resent and dislike each other in the same house is not always a better situation that two divorced parents and some stability because the turmoil is over. And I say this the child of divorce. The best thing my parents ever did was divorce. Our lives didn't go to shit because my parents split. Don't let people tell you that. It improved because it stopped being tense. Do you people really think children can't sense and see these things?[/quote]

THIS!!!

Sounds like you wanted a partner and got a four kid. That is a HUGE turn off.

My friend was in your situation. Almost exact. She told him she wanted a trail separation. Since the house was in her name he moved into a nearby apartment. He did not want to separate or the divorce. But she is a person to not follow through with her threats. This time she did. They were in therapy together for a while then he just went for himself. Things change big time for them and they are back together. This is not the case for every marriage, but being separated they were able to work on themselves and see what life was like apart. Life is short. He will still be a father to the kids if you are in the same house or not. You two are giving the example of what a married couple looks like. 
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