Reply to First time hanging out with neighbors...invited to cookout. What should I bring?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Drives me nuts when people randomly show up with food they expect me to serve[/quote]

You must be a lovely hostess.[/quote]

I am.

Fully planned, well executed meals. Fully stocked bar. Wine matched to the food.

Don't really need a dish cooked in a manner I don't know, of unknown quality, that may or may not compliment my menu. [/quote]
It would probably make everyone happy if you made clear in some polite way that don't need any help with the meal. I think it's assumed that people will bring something to a barbeque, unless notified to the contrary. I'd be delighted not to have to do anything but show up. Re alcohol - unless you know the hosts really well, I'd stay away from bringing beer or wine. Plenty of former alcoholics in this area who don't need or appreciate the temptation. I'm not one of them, but I've become sensitive to the issue.[/quote]

Not PP, but isn't the act of not asking for something, 'making clear in a polite way' that they don't need help?
I get this is a BBQ, so pretty casual, but regardless when I get together with (new) friends and they invite me to a gathering at their house, I generally say what can I bring? And either they say that an app or a dessert would be appreciated or they say Nothing, we've got it under control and so I know. Now, that probably didn't happen here. But, as a host when extending an invitation if it was expected that the guest would bring something, in the invitation I'd ask if it would be troublesome for them to make xyz, or there was a side dish they would like to share?
To me, the silence on this issue indicates they have the food under control. [/quote]

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