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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, what exactly are you looking for? I can understand the logic, if you like sex and physical affection, then having more then one partner must be better then having only one partner... kind of like how if a one week vacation is nice, then a two week one must be even better. Realize that the type of person you'll be dealing with will not be healthy. Nobody wants to be second best even if they say so... and most of the polyamorous folks I've ran into are very articulate. They aren't stupid, they just aren't healthy. They won't care about you as a human being, though they will say what they need to to convince you to hop into bed with them. If you're marriage isn't what you'd want, I'd urge you to fix it or at least try. My husband and I went through a period where polyamory seemed like a good idea. He got involved in old person type activities, Freemasons anda church that was made up of and served the needs of old people. We lived in an area that was nice but had virtually no kid activities. Once I was able to articulate my feelings on our life together and we both made changes (I can't emphasize the second part enough) things got better. The folks who are into polyamory lack the skills to be in a healthy monogamous relationship. They like sex and adult companionship as much as anybody, but it's like eating a Hershey bar when what you really want is Belgian chocolate. [/quote]

So, you have never tried polyamory, you have never been a third and you are an expert in such matters? Do you have an enormous set of close poly friends that you have studied over the years?

What cracks me up is that my DH and I have a pretty solid marriage and both come from great intact families. WE are just realistic about the misery that monogamy levies on a species that are not naturally monogamous.

I see unhealthy people ALL OVER THE PLACE. What I see a lot of in my monogamous friends are miserable marriages.  Marriages that are sexless, without intimacy, with a lot of deceit, dull, and stale. I see partners who no longer care to impress each other. Judge away, but I will tell you that a little bit of jealousy and competition is EXCELLENT for a marriage. It is never good to get too secure in your position and it is also good to realize that your partner is desired and that you are with each other not because there are no other option, but because that is ultimately who you WANT to be with. Once you get to see exactly how green the grass is on the other side, if your marriage is strong, you will be right back tending your own lawn.[/quote]

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