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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would back the heck off after this. Take a break. Let DH give his family members a "What the heck? My wife does the best she can, she sends you photos, talks with you on the phone, now this? Are you crazy? She talks with you more than she talks to some of her closest friends for crying out loud. You are out of line, and you owe my wife an apology." See what they say to DH when he puts them on the spot for their behavior. If the apologize, great.

If not, just stop contact for awhile--not DH, but you. Continuing their normal level of contact isn't how you would respond to anyone else treating you this way, right? Don't get on the phone when DH calls, let DH be the one to send baby photos, don't arrange the beach house visit if that couple is the one who acted like this, possibly block them on Facebook for now.

Back off and let them realize how good they had it. Think about what you actually want based on this new information after several weeks and go from there.[/quote]

Yes to the above post. OP, some are advising you to handle all this yourself, not let DH handle it, but I agree with this post--the mantra here is, "His family, his job." And you know what? He has your back here! Take a moment to sit down and appreciate the fact that HE is so willing to run interference and he understands that they, not you, are out of line. There are so very many posts on DCUM about spouses who either won't get involved when their own families attack the relative-by-marriage, or spouses who also turn on the beleaguered one and say, "Well, my mom/dad/siblings are fine, so YOU must be the problem." You instead have a spouse who is backing you up. That's truly something to be grateful for, and I think you already know that based on your replies here. I'm glad he's on your side.

The level of contact you have with these in-laws is more than I have with my in-laws or my own brother. They sound as if they are profoundly needy and have decided almost collectively to make you the target of their neediness, possibly as some weird way to get your DH's attention--? I would hope your DH would say exactly what the post above outlines.

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