Reply to Will my partner never be happy?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hmmm, this sounds pretty much exactly what my spouse told me last weekend (except I do most of the chores OP mentioned). I guess I am one of these demanding megabitches. Here's my POV:

-- life is suffering. Happiness is an exception, not the norm. Sensitive people are brooding. We do not approach life like a dopey eager golden retriever.

-- for someone who is way harsher on myself than I ever am on others, when I'm being critical I'm already factoring in caring about someone's feelings and toning it down. It may come across as harsh, but you have little appreciation for how harsh I'm NOT being.

-- I don't need you to go easy on me. You can be direct. I can own my mistakes, and handle criticism without thinking, "how could you?" So why can't you?

-- I simply do not understand the life OP envisions. Why do I have to treat my spouse like my boss -- someone to tell white lies to, someone whose ego needs constant massage, someone whose incompetence must never be pointed out? I don't understand this vision of marriage. That isn't respect to me. That's servitude, and fear of retribution.

[/quote]

People who try to be happy and take ownership of their actions and feelings are not "dopey"--what a sad example you are for your kids if you have them. What you don't understand is that most people find you horribly draining to be around. Always bitching, always negative. Nothing is ever find. And god knows nothing has ever made you truly happy.    I am wondering if you are my husbands first wife?  If so, thanks for lowering the bar so much.  He thinks I walk on water because I am actually a driven AND happy person.  I am betting you dont have a lot, if any, female friends.  Beacuse you think they don't appreciate you being "Direct"- no dear.  They just think you have a soul sucking personality. [/quote]

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