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[quote=Anonymous]First, I totally agree about saving money. In my case, my XH took me to court four times. You just never know how much money you need and it's not going to be a problem to be "saving too much." So I totally think you are on the right track to look at a 1 BR and bring your costs as low as possible.

Second, I think your DD's feelings about the apartment will depend on your feelings. If you can make it clear to yourself and her that there are great benefits to the apartment, it will make a big difference. What about a canopy or drape over the bed, to create more ability to sleep in but add a really cool atmosphere? What about a bunk bed with a playspace underneath? Show her some pictures. Talk about it with her so you are aware of her concerns (like if she's afraid of heights and won't want to sleep in a bunk bed.)

What about looking for a building that is very near the zoo or right near a wonderful playground? That can make apartment living much easier. And it makes it more likely there are other kids in the building.

When you move in, put up flyers suggesting playdates at a fixed time at that playground, telling people you'll be wearing a "green" (or whatever) t-shirt. The more friends she has in the building, the more she will LOVE being there. Also, you will find it's pretty cool to go to playdates in your PJS and slippers.

Finally, it's important not to send any message of insecurity or anxiety about dad having it nicer. He might objectively, but this is your child. She loves you for who you are. She wants to be with you and have good times with you. You are opening up a wedge by showing her any of that insecurity about "daddy's nice home" or "nice car," etc. My line to my son is "Yes, things are sure different at Daddy's and Mommy's. We have different rules and different bathrooms. Sometimes that's great and sometimes not so great; that's what different things are like. They are nice in different ways."[/quote]

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