Reply to What clinic in the area does gender balancing?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]OP here. I understand that you are looking at this from your own angle, but things are different for us. If we use these embryos at all (it's not a given), we'd use only one out of nine. Why shouldn't we be allowed to decide which one, out of the healthy ones, we choose, assuming there are several? One of them will get chosen based on certain conditions, it's not a random pick. So why shouldn't we be allowed to pick one based on conditions that are important to us?[/quote]

OP. Part of typical allele screening including figuring out the gender. The reports from the labs include whether it's an XX or XY as some abnormalities link to the Y chromosomes, only. So when it's all said and done, let's say you have 9 genetically normal embryos that are recommended for transfer, then you can say which ones you want. But you likely cannot just ask for gender screening/testing. [/quote]

OP here. Yes. I understand that.  We would want to do a full-on genetic testing on all nine to identify the ones that are chromosomally normal. Assuming there are more than one (and I believe there WILL be more than one), we would want to choose the gender of the chromosomally normal embryo to transfer.

Look, I understand the sensitivities around this. The pain of infertility is real. But you have to remember that infertility comes in many variations; it isn't always up to the woman.  My DH has multiple sclerosis and cannot, so to speak, deliver the payload.  With me being 40, we thought IVF was our only option. We were very surprised when we ended up with a ton of eggs and ton of embryos on our first try.  We implanted two best-looking ones without any testing, and one took, and turned out to be chromosomally normal. We had no idea that so many of them will survive to day 6 and be good enough to freeze. So the fact of the matter is that we already have (or will have shortly, knock on wood) two children, one of each gender, and if we go for a third, I'd like to have a hand in deciding which one of the nine will have a shot.  If we had only two or three embryos on the shelf, this wouldn't occur to me, then it would be "what happens, happens". But we have nine.  Only one will have a shot, and we will have to pick it, because no one else is entitled to this decision.  Now I understand that being chromosomally normal is in no way a guarantee of implantation or successful pregnancy. That's a given. But all things being equal, all I'm saying is we want to decide who gets the chance first, so to speak. And I wish the clinics wouldn't make it so difficult for people in our situation. [/quote]

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