Reply to Fear of losing them to the other coast...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This discussion made me sad. Am a 16 hour flight away from my parents and will probably be this way for the rest of my life and their lives. It was all fun and games when I decided to come here for college but now I worry about my parents getting older and sometimes when emergencies crop up its difficult to help them deal when I am not there.
Can't move back either, fell in love here and DH job is not mobile. Such is life.[/quote]

Why don't your parents move closer to where you live?[/quote]

We are all living longer and plan to have happy, active and productive lives well into our 80s and in some cases 90s.  Part of that happiness includes enjoying the company of long-time friends, neighbors and remaining active in our communities.  It is not a foregone conclusion that we will all be ready to retire and just pick up stakes to be with our kids.  So, I envy the parents with kids still close by, knowing full well that we can't control their movements.  For those of us with adult children on the west coast and are anchored by careers, friends, and community here, the choice to move is much more complicated.[/quote]

+1000. PP with parents 16 hours away. This captures everything exactly.[/quote]

Yes.

I went a long way from home for college and basically never went home again except for vacations. My parents have been nothing but gracious about it, but I know that it saddens them to have me and their grandchildren so far away. I really feel very ambivalent about having gone so far away for school. In some ways it was good for me, and there is no doubt that if I hadn't done it I'd have an entirely different job in an entirely different part of the country and I would not be married to DH so wouldn't have my children. OTOH, I suspect that my life would have turned out similarly and likely just as happily had I stayed in-state. And I would have been able to see my parents and extended family so much more.

We have told our DCs that they can look at colleges east of the Mississippi. I think that this gives them pretty wide latitude. We've also given them a limit on what we can afford, so in-state colleges are very much on the table. I'm not sorry about that.[/quote]

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