Reply to Need Help with My Mental Attitude Towards my DD

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, kuddos to you for trying to figure out what's going on. A couple of things:

1. don't be so suspicious of her TV news interest. I was exactly like that. Remember Jones Town? Iran Hostage? I was 8-10 when both of those events happened and my parents could not drag me away from the TV. I'm now a documentary filmmaker. At about this time in development, kids start to understand the concept that bad things can and do happen. She's probably trying to grapple with that. For what it's worth, I'm an extremely empathetic person. Probably to a fault.

2. My husband, who is very smart, has ADHD and was not diagnosed until he was 52, probably because he was smart enough to do work arounds in school and thus fool his teachers. His mother still does not believe the diagnosis! Anyway, ADHD also looks very different in girls, and many teachers, given its higher prevalence in boys, are usually familiar with the more classic male symptoms. So just because teachers haven't said anything doesn't mean you shouldn't have her evaluated.

3. Often a genetic predisposition for anxiety and depression means that you may start to see symptoms slightly earlier than the general population. Often that is pre-adolescence, as the hormones begin to change, especially in girls. So, I don't think you're being paranoid.

4. Please do not believe that you are either born creative or not. Such a load of crap!!! Creativity is expansive and is not just crafts; it's how you approach problem solving, how you interact with people, how you substitute one ingredient for another in a recipe. It requires effort and, most importantly, practice in the process of doing. So just begin small with something you know she has a kernel of interest in. How about taking her to the Newseum? And when you're there, notice what excites her. If it's gruesome, and she's not out back killing animals (!), explore some aspect of that. Just ask questions. I remember my dad asking me about Jonestown massacre, "How do you think he got those people to live in the jungle?" I don't think he meant it as a creative thinking exercise, but it was the first time I had ever really consciously wondered why people do the things they do. Try to stop criticizing her and figure out a way to reach her on her terms.

Good luck![/quote]

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