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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DH and in-laws are in uproar.  A cousin threw a bar mitzvah for his kid, and it turned out there was no meal for the guests, many of whom flew in from out of state.[b]  After the ceremony, they were told to go off and fend for themselves, basically. [/b] The next day, I think there was a bagel breakfast (no lox).

This is not done, right?  DH and family are calling this very stingy and tacky.  The old folks are flabbergasted.

I was raised Catholic, and if we don't feed people after First Communion, it's no biggie.  I guess you should have some food out for a funeral, though, I don't know.

Is this a massively big deal as everyone is making it out to be, or do they just not like Cousin?  There have been whispers that said Cousin is basically throwing hospitality out the window to convert his son's bar mitzvah into a money grab.  Is this kind of accusation justified?[/quote]

So if you're saying this is basically what happened, what [b]actually[/b] happened? Did the family offer to bring everyone home for lunch, and no one liked that idea? Or a specific restaurant that no one could agree on? Was there a small food offering that people felt was inadequate? Was the actual celebration the following day (which you feel is inadequate)

It would be customary to provide a meal afterwarda but not necessary. [/quote]

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