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[quote=Anonymous]Tough to advise you OP as this is tricky stuff and we don't know you (or anyone else involved.)  Here are my two cents:

- I absolutely believe in gut instincts - both yours from all those years ago, and yours now regarding your daughter.
- your reactions to your father, and your daughter, will naturally be colored by your feelings of the prior event.  So it is practically impossible for you to put your daughter's comments in any other context than a pretty loaded emotional one.  That may or may not be a fair context for her statements.  
- your daughter is 5.  I absolutely believe in a 5 yr old being able to reject attention from anyone who makes her uncomfortable, in being able to say no,  etc...  And I fully support my daughter in those choices - even if/when they don't always seem rational to me.  That being said - 5 year olds are still 5, and their motivations and reasons for doing or saying things are often VERY different than what we might assume or project on to them.
- no abuse actually happened to you.  I don't mean to diminish your feelings - I totally support trusting your instincts.  But nothing constituting abuse actually happened.
- you can protect/shield your daughter from being alone or in jeapardy without fulling cutting off contact - can't you?

As I said, it's pretty tough to fairly offer advice here.  But just on what you're able to share it feels like there ought to be a middle ground where you don't have to totally cut off all contact in order to keep your daughter safe.  You may need to work things out far more directly with your father however, than you would prefer to do.  It will take real strength - whatever you decide.  I wish you luck.
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