Reply to Teacher just told me my son has been bullying

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hon, he's not a bully.  Three year olds lack empathy, impulse control, and social skills.  He's learning, and you are helping him learn.  Throw away shame and help him do better next week.[/quote]

AGREED.  I spent three years dealing with severe bullying with 13 year olds with my oldest.  Your son is NOT a bully.  The teacher should know that.

He's using what would be termed inappropriate responses.  You've already realized he's learning some of them at home.  At this age you look for the reason, as others have said.  Then you teach him how you want him to respond.  When you explain things keep it short.  By the time you've gotten through a long explanation he's lost interest.

"No, you don't push people."  I don't even go with "Don't push your friends."  I heard one kid respond with "not my friend!"  (The kid isn't a friend, so I can push him.)

If he's going to push, then take him away from that person.  It might take the teacher being on him like a wet blanket for a few days but he'll clue in.  I'm not so sure time outs work at this age.

Work on gentler responses at home.  Cut the yelling, if you have to redirect physically don't grab.

He's three.  He's learning. :)[/quote]

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