Reply to Worried I will be supporting my troubled (adult) brother

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So for any BTDT or knowledgeable folks, how would you really force home the issue of housing for the sibling after they pass (assuming sibling relies on mom and dad for housing currently, somehow)?
I am a PP.  My parents have a trust set up for my brother, but that only really covers how their estate is handled and who's doling out the money. I know that, left to his own devices, my brother will not have stable housing (he currently lives in an apartment financed by disability + parents' dole).  I would love for them to leave him the house, but it's in a 55+ community so pretty sure he wouldn't be able to live there unless they hang on for another 20 years (doubtful)!
Who would you go to in this case?  I don't think there are any good options among the relatives as they will be seen as "taking my side" by my parents.  My parents do have a seemingly reputable financial planner.  Would I just call him out of the blue or something?[/quote]

I'm a PP.  I haven't BTDT, but do have a sort of plan.  My parents also have a trust set up, that I will manage for my brother.    He currenty lives with my parents.  When they pass, or are no longer able to love in the home, we'll sell the house and get my brother an apartment.  The trust plus his portion of the house sale will hopefully cover rent/living expenses for a significant amount of time.  It may also been an option to purchase a smaller place for him to live - like a condo or something.  He does work now - so I'm hoping that he will continue to be employed, and I can work with him to continue to build his savings so that he has a better chance of self sufficiency.

All of that said, I don't foresee a future where I'm not financially responsible for my brother at some point.  My DH is an only child, and has been pretty understanding as my parents age and I'm starting this process.  He has said that he would be open to helping provide financial support, but we would both prefer that my brother never actually live with us.  For a lot if reasons that go beyond a DCUM post.  I'm glad FH is supportive, but the responsibility is already pretty significant as my parents' health declines.  I'm in my early 30s, and we've only been married for about a year and a half. All if this already has had some impact on our own financial planning (for example, we continue to push back having children).  So these things bum me out a lot, but I don't see a lot of good options and I'm doing what I can.

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