Reply to How do you develop a self-motivated child? A kindergartener who can work independently?

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[quote=Anonymous]
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I'm the poster from before, and I should mention I have a child with some learning disabilities. I stand by what I said - what is happening in your example is that he doesn't know how to approach the work. You are providing support and scaffolding, it's that support which enables him to do it. A lot of subtle learning disabilities look like this - you feel like the information is already "in there" because the child has learned it, but there's some connection missing, or a skill deficit, which is why he can't do it on his own and needs help getting started.  I would of course try to be laid-back and uncritical, but I would also keep in mind that if it is happening at school it's likely to be something he needs help with, not just something about your style. It is very likely that with support he will eventually get it and be able to do it himself, but he does need that support - and I'd talk to his teacher about what she suggests.[/quote]

Also, when he resists - that's anxiety. It's not that he's defying your or the teacher, it's that he honestly doesn't have the skills he needs to start work. It may be too early to diagnose ADHD, but this behavior pattern is one that I have seen in kids with ADHD and executive-function disorders. You don't need to "come down hard on him," you need to give him the tools he needs.[/quote]

What are these tools?

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