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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom is a nightmare, freak show, racist bigot, etcetera. She's verbally abusive to the point of fairly tale stepmother behavior, and leaves a trail of chaos and tears wherever she goes. [b]This behavior started about ten years ago, before that she was a decent mom and a lovely woman.[/b] No idea where it's coming from but with the things she's said to me I don't have any interest in knowing. I've largely cut her out and see her, at most, once every two years for a day at someone else's house or an official function. 18 months ago I got married to the man of my dreams (of another race, as well) and two months ago our wonderful baby girl was born. My mom knows of none of this and I want to keep her in the dark. She'll be judgmental and honestly I don't want my kid to have to deal with her. I have to see her in a month at a wedding, there's no way to get around it (believe me, I've tried.) I'm considering sending out a notice to everyone at the wedding, about 150-200 people (or asking the host to do so) requesting that my family not be mentioned. Am I being crazy here? Help me. Thanks.[/quote]

Don't go to the wedding or go and deal with the situation as it arises. Don't ask people to lie for you.

In any event, I just wanted to say that your mother is probably sick if this is a new(ish) behavior and she used to be  a "lovely woman" 10 years ago. She probably has dementia or something similar. Cut her a break and try to help her, although there is nothing much you can do. But if she is sick, be compassionate and remember your "real mother" was a lovely woman once.

GL.[/quote]

+1 it could even have been a small stroke.  My grandmother had a personality change after her first stroke.  It was really the only external sign that something had happened. [/quote]

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