Reply to Husband Regressed Sexually

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Husband Regressed Sexually"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]Thank you all for your help. The fact that he wanted it but wasn't quite comfortable enough is exactly the issue b/c I  worked with him, and it took a lot of time and effort from both of us to work together to help him be comfortable enough to do what he already wanted to but just didn't know how to get comfortable with. Since it took so long I figured that since he'd been able to go at his own pace it'd stay the way it was when he had gotten to that place of being comfortable. The sudden regression (sorry whoever that offended but i really don't know how else to describe it) was/is confusing and I'm just looking for help or advice. I mentioned before, but I do not withhold sex from him or pressure/manipulate him in any way whatsoever. When I've talked to him I've been very sensitive, non-accusatory, non-combative, and just asked him what happened b/c I don't understand and can't help if idk the issue. I think the advice to approach it differently by not asking "what happened" is a very good idea, and I'll put that to use next time I try to talk to him. I always leave time in between that b/c of the fact that I don't want him to feel pressured. About kids, we actually just had a baby in July. Since this started way before then I'm sure it's not the cause but probably isn't helping. I do give him space, and have considered the fact that we recently had a baby. I haven't pursued the issue in a while b/c of that, but I was going to try to approach him again in the next few weeks & was looking for advice so maybe I could do it in a better, more effective way since obviously what I've been doing the last year & a half wasn't working. I don't foresee me ever leaving over sex, I love him tremendously & in every single other aspect of our marriage we couldn't be happier. This is the only disconnect. If I had no choice but to live with it, then so be it, but if there was any way to try to get past another hang up then of course I'd rather at least try... Also, I have tried doing the one thing at a time approach since I don't want to overwhelm him. I've made it very simple yes or no questions even, but he doesn't respond at all so I drop it for a while. I think y'all are right about it just taking more effort from him, which I hadn't really thought of since it doesn't require effort from me to do those things. I guess I didn't realize that not everyone is like that. Never had a man resist or flat out refuse to go there so it just never occurred to me, but I can totally see & understand that. It would make sense for him b/c he is fairly passive. Thank you all, there are some really helpful points to consider that I'm sure will at least help the situation or, more appropriately, help me help him.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics