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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP: The thing is, I am not going to be so simple minded about 1) basic human urges 2) the collective events that led up to the emotional break between us that I believe led to the cheating. He did something weak and immature but I was also being shitty and mean.

Honestly, I get it and what happened. And it was a one off. My whole thing is all the fuckin self help advice online and everywhere is I am submitting to some kind of domestic abuse by staying with him. There are no gray areas.

I really actually have forgiven him already... just feeling screwed up because of what that forgiveness might mean. We always pump up forgiveness in society as holy and aspirational but when someone does it we call them a dummy...[/quote]

I "forgave" but realized I didn't really... I still think about it 2 years later and hold it against him. Now I feel stuck because we've since had a baby (conceived when I thought I had forgiven him). It's a truly crappy feeling to still be dwelling over it. If you don't have kids I would move on. [/quote]

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