Reply to UCSD Shooting Suspect had autism -just what we need

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Reply to "UCSD Shooting Suspect had autism -just what we need"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This has to be the most self-absorbed forum on DCUM, hands down. [/quote]
I, unfortunately, have to agree. Many (NOT all) of these parents are toxic. I work with them every day. Getting them onto healthy parenting patterns, is like pulling teeth. Sorry, guys.[/quote]

Wow, I wish you would write some identifying information so you would be fired.  Toxic?  You are the one who sounds toxic.

Parents of kids with ASDs are like any other group of parents, that is to say mixed.  (Though having spent time in MANY therapeutic waiting rooms with MANY such parents, I have to say that as a whole they rise to the occasion and are a pretty amazing and empathetic bunch.  We have each others' backs.) It sounds like you are putting the parents under an unfair microscope, maybe because you don;t understand how difficult it is and think you could do better. Or maybe you don;t know what the hell you are doing and they don;t follow your directions, so you label them toxic. Or maybe they have shadow ASD characteristics themselves -- which is very frequently the case -- and you are too ignorant to recognize that.

I have an NT child, I have seen toxic parents.  They are the ones who over schedule their kids, brag about their kids, make their kids an extension of their narcissism, push their kids to be perfect in everything. You see none of these things in parents of kids with ASDs.[/quote]
The toxic parents that I know, think that natural consequences are equivalent to child abuse. So consistant consequences simply aren't happening. Based on what I see (20+ years,) this is exactly how many of these problems begin, very early on. Again, my opinion is based on many years of family observations.

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