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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=RHinVA][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  I can guarantee you I'm not in it for the life insurance.  You are a true asshat and I sincerely hope this never happens to you.  What an odd thing to suggest.
Thank you to everyone else for posting.
15:59-thank you for posting these links.  This is very helpful.
I know this is an anonymous board but you all have made me feel better.[/quote]

Op, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.  I was facebook friends with a lady who died of colon cancer.  She posted through her journey and then her husband posted after she couldn't.  I don't know if you're religious at all but that is one route to peace that you might explore.

Here's a link I found for grief support groups - http://www.griefshare.org/ - also maybe on meetup.com you could find others in your situation?  It seems like it should be so easy to find a group of spouses/SOs of the dying.

I'm not sure from your post how much time your boyfriend has left.  If it's very short, like less than a year, I think it would be very hard for you to say goodbye now and try to move on before he has passed.  If it's several years, maybe he's right?  I don't know.

I just know that you should tell him that your time with him wasn't wasted, that every day in this life is a gift for each of us to do with as we choose.  Your time with him was special and shaped who you are and made you a better person as love always does.  You're better for knowing and loving him than you would have been without.  I don't mean to sound hokey, but "you could have missed the pain, but you would have missed the dance."  Love always ends, and never when we want it to, but I believe we're always better for having truly loved someone.  And that couldn't have happened with just anyone, it happened with him, and he should be proud of having given you that gift of love.  [/quote]

Thank you so much for writing that PP.  I'm so raw right now and this is exactly what I want to say to him.
You bring up another side to this.  We don't know how long he has.  He told me that he feels he doesn't have much longer.
The thought of moving on if he only has a little time left would be impossible.  I want to be with him through it.
I never imagined I would be 32 and facing something like this.

[/quote]

You are awfully young to have to go through this. It's not fair but life rarely is. Stay strong, but let yourself cry. Also, have you read books by Elisabeth kubler Ross?  She is the expert on the stages of grief.

--RH[/quote] 
I haven't heard of her.  Will try to pick it up at the library tomorrow.
I've been reading "The Year of Magical Thinking" by Joan Didion.
She writes about her life in the year after her husband died.
Knowing that I'm not the only person to have gone through this helps.[/quote]

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