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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm a Peds ICU doc. I take care of your worst nightmare. It's hard to sympathize with DH venting about office stuff when I'm still trying to process caring for the 2 year old that was beaten to death or the 8 year old that last week was fine but now we are taking her off life support.[/quote]

well, it sounds like you might not be totally 'toughened up' but yes, that is on some absolute objective scale much worse than...

[quote]I'm not saying my DH's work stress is any less real but it does lack the horrific impact on human beings that I deal with on a daily basis.[/quote]

...your husband's office stress.  But that's the thing: everything is relative.  We don't live in a world where everyone is operation on some global universal scale.  Think about how your pts experience pain: are they really all exactly the same?  Feelings are even more nebulous.  Your husband's stresses are real to him, as real as yours are to you.

Honestly, though, it sounds like you might be losing respect for him and have some contempt for his concerns.  At the end of it all, what difference does it make whether his worries are silly and trivial in your view?  What are you really being asked to do beyond listen?  [/quote]
Appreciate the armchair psych consult however the day I am so "toughened up" that seeing a child burned alive for crying or beaten to death for soiling his diaper fails to bother me is the day I quit medicine.  No idea why you feel I do not respect DH. He actually says my work helps him keep his work in perspective. [/quote]

Those sorts of horrific deaths can not be a normal part of your every day in the ER.  I'm sure that you've seen plenty of horrors and hopeless situations.  But you have also saved lives and helped to mitigate the damage done by illness/accident - those very real successes are part of your every day, too.  And that is what you have to focus on.

It is also important to realize that your dh deals with stresses and problems all day long, too.  Some he can solve, some that can't be solved. His work is different than yours is but it is also important. [/quote]
Of course I focus on the good stuff :) but I actually work in the Peds ICU, not  the ED so unfortunately, there's always at least 2-3 victims of "non-accidental trauma" in our PICU. With 36 beds and being a primary trauma referral center, we do see the worst of the worst.[/quote]

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