Reply to Queen Bee Mom unhappy with me and I'm afraid my kid will pay the price

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Ignore the QB all of the time and push back - HARD - when/if she ever says anything negative about your child.

Moms, let's not give our power away!  That is more important for your daughter to see than you "pretending" to be "nice" and actually be a doormat for an aggressive, nasty QB.  Teach your daughters to stand up for themselves by…standing up for yourself.  I've done this with a group of QB types at my children's school and you know what, now, THEY kowtow to me.   They are the ones who walk on eggshells around me (after all, they KNOW I'll call out any bullish#%!).

Claim and demand your own position.  If you don't, you are choosing to be a doormat and you are, in fact, allowing the QB baloney to continue.

That said, you have to be strong to do this.  You have to go into it not caring if they "like" you or think you are "nice" in the end.  Truth is they aren't in it for "liking" or for "niceness", so you've got nothing to lose.[/quote]

I tried that a few years ago. DS's playdates dried up, and most of the mutual mom acquaintances went to the QB's side. Whatever you do, the QB will twist it so that [u]you[/u] look like the nutjob and make sure every other mom knows her version of the story.

Do I care? No. I have a pretty demanding job, kids with busy schedules, and no time in my day for petty school dramas. But just know that it doesn't always get better if you stand up to the QBs.

[/quote]

I hear you, but I still believe that pushing back this way - and not caring about her reaction/whether she likes you/etc.- is the only way to go.  If others really take to her (or believe her "story") or whatever, I say good-riddance.  This is the part where not caring becomes important.  You don't want your child around this type of social circle anyway (the kids learn from the parents after all).  Yes, it's crummy, but when people show you who they are, you must listen and act appropriately.  If it means no more superficial chit-chat with a nasty school mom, so be it.  If it means your child gets iced out by the children of this type of mom, so be it.  Just means you have to find other, more compatible parents and kids.  So worth it.[/quote]

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